The Franchise Fails

The big thing in baseball this year is The Franchise Four where each team will elect four players from their history who best represents their respective teams.  You can vote for them here: Vote for the Franchise Four. In light of this and as requested by the legendary Goodness Gracious James Ball of fire, I decided to do the Reds' Franchise Fails as I am a Reds fan.

We all know the legend of the Big Red Machine and the great 8 and all that.  The Reds have a great history: Rose, Bench, Morgan, Perez, and Concepcion (among others) from the Big Red Machine and even before that, Frank Robinson and The Great Ted Klusewski, or Big Klu as Dustin Hoffman would say in Rain Man.

After the Big Red Machine players like Larkin and Davis showed how the Reds were best represented, so there are no shortage of players to pick for the Franchise Four.  My picks if you are curious are:

1. Johnny Bench (who was a key component of the machine and possibly the greatest catcher of all time, and George Clooney is a big fan so he's doing something right)

2. Joe Morgan (also a B.R.M. guy and a badass, the elbow twitch he did at the plate made all the ladies ga ga in the stands)

3. Barry Larkin (the last captain for the Reds.  He had big shoes to fill after taking over for Davey Concepcion, a fan favorite and boy he did.  He helped the Reds win a 'wire to wire' World Series in 1990 and played his entire career in his hometown)

4. Pete Rose (I know he bet on baseball and all that but the dude lived and breathed Reds baseball.  He was a hometown kid who had hometown grit and played the game how it was supposed to be played.  He played the game with attitude in a blue collar city that appreciated it)

Now to the point you've all been waiting for, the Franchise Fails.  As you know, this year's Reds team has a pitcher on it named Kevin Gregg. He was a non roster invite to Spring Training and somehow made the team.  On Opening Day, he gave up a game-tying two run homer and hasn't looked back since then.  He is the inspiration for this list.  He will not make it as he's only been a Red for 2 months.  His tenure is already a gigantic fail though. He doesn't even deserve the effort in typing this up.

The Franchise Fails have to be more impactful than a journeyman reliever like Gregg.  They have had to have sucked so badly that the franchise actually suffered because of them and that leads me to another pitcher:

Franchise Fail #1: Jimmy Haynes.  Haynes won 15 games for the Reds in 2001.  That was amazing compared to the awfulness of the pitching staff at that point.  That got the Reds to give him a 2.5 million dollar deal to re-sign for one year. Haynes made only 5 appearances in 2002 while compiling a 9.6 ERA (pretty terrible for an ace).  Jimmy Haynes stunk so bad, you'd think he was the stinch from a pair of Haynes worn 3 days in a row.

Franchise Fail #2: Eric Milton. Milton had a pretty good reputation before joining the Reds.  He even pitched a no-hitter in 1999 for the Twins. After the 2004 season, he signed a three year deal worth $25 million dollars.  The dude went on to have an 8-15 record with a 6.47 ERA (one of the worst ERAS for a full time starter in NL history).  That's what happens when you put a fly ball pitcher in GABP. He gave up 29 homers in 26 starts the next season, and finally after 4 starts in 2007 had Tommy John surgery.  ESPN named him to the all-overpaid team and he deserved that.

Franchise Fail #3: Willy Taveras. Taveras had an okay career before signing a two year deal worth $6.25 million dollars in December 2008.  During his 2009 season with the Reds he had the lowest slugging percentage (.285) and worst on base percentage (.275) for all National League players with at least 350 plate appearances. Thankfully they traded him before 2010.  Jeeze, he made you miss Corey Patterson (who should be an honorable mention himself) and that's saying a lot. 

Franchise Fail #4: Brandon Larson. Larson was one of the most sought after infielders after his solid 1997 season with LSU.  He was drafted in the first round (14th overall) by the Reds in the draft. The dude was a monster in the minors, winning Reds minor leaguer of the year in 2003.  In 2004, he was brought up to the big leagues with tons of hype.  The guy only played in 40 games for the Reds and hit .212.  He was never heard from again.I don't even know how they managed to make an action baseball card of him.

So those are just a few of the fails.  There are plenty more. Paul Wilson comes to mind, along with Gary Majewski, Roberto Kelly, and others.  If you want to read a related blog I wrote regarding the Coolest Reds of all time, click here: 50 Coolest Reds, including starting lineup, 25 + 40 man rosters. Maybe this will take the bad taste out of your mouth of these fails of men.

Song of the Day: In honor of James Ball, Big Balls, AC/DC

Brawl at the Shootout, Alec Baldwin, and Yeti Crabs.

As many of you already know, I am a Kentucky Wildcats fan.  I have been since birth and for some reason that I've never understood, Kentucky fans are supposed to hate UC.  I never really got it because there was no big rivalry or anything.  It's not like they play all the time.  The last time they played was in the NCAA tournament where UC was a 7 seed and Kentucky was a 2.  Eric Hicks and Jason Maxiell were the stars of UC, and Rajon Rondo, Randolph Morris, and Patrick Sparks were the stars of Kentucky.   I used to hate them because that's how I was taught, especially during the Bob Huggins era.  When Huggy Bear was let go of his duties, I started to follow them a little more.  I actually liked Jason Maxiell.  I have nothing against UC anymore.  I see no reason for it so that is that.  Now as for Xavier, I've always followed them, a little Catholic school in the heart of Cincinnati.  I've rooted for them to do well.  I liked players like Romain Sato and Lionel Chalmers who led the team to a surprising Elite 8 appearance.  They've been one of my favorite teams.  They're from the A-10 and I always like the underdog schools and they're local so why not cheer for them?

Anyway, I have always enjoyed the Crosstown shootout, and I usually cheer for the away team or underdog because I don't cheer for one team over another at any other point in the season.  Any of you that talk to me about college basketball know that I've always been a fan of Yancy Gates.  Yeah, he's a little bit of a thug but he's also a good guy if you listen to him speak.  He never lived up to his potential and he gets lazy on rebounds and doesn't run the court like he should, but I've always liked him.  I bring all of this up because of one of the craziest brawls I've seen in basketball.  I remember the malice in the Palace where fans got involved, but the one on Saturday was just as insane.  The game was a blowout going X's way.  Just win and as a Catholic school, you let your play speak for yourself right?  No that's not the case.  The Xavier players smack talked the whole time, starting during the National Anthem.  They never let up.  They cussed and taunted at UC coaches and fans, and of course, the players.  Xavier's image is a nice little Jesuit school, that doesn't condone any of this.  The fans chanted "Fu*K UC" during the game at Xavier's Cintas Center and things were boiling the whole game.  Smack talking came from both sides and the referees gave a total of one technical foul the whole game.  They didn't understand the rivalry.  The schools hate each other.  Anyway, a UC player got in the face of Tu Holloway, a first team preseason All-American.  Something happened to wear #5 for Xavier pushed the UC player over right in front of UC's bench.  Then all hell broke loose.  Yancy, who had the ball threw it directly at Holloway.  The benches cleared. Yancy blind sided Kenneth Fraese and it knocked him out immediately.  It was a nice punch but Kenneth was blindsided and I don't like cheap shots.  This doesn't change my opinion of Yancy though.  I still like the guy.  He was just coming to the defense of his teammate who was pushed down.  Those of you who talk to me regularly know I am a huge fan of Pat Sims on the Bengals for doing the same thing.  And at the press conference, for some reason they let the Xavier kids speak.  They came off with a "we are better than them" attitude.  Not just in basketball but like snobbish.  They aren't though.  Where you go to school does not matter.  UC has the thug reputation. I.E. Steve Logan, Leonard Stokes, Ruben Patterson, Danny Fortson, and who could forget Art Long who was known for punching a horse.  He later went on to work one of the basketball booths at King's Island.  Back to this situation on Saturday:  I believe that this could be avoided if the referees had called a few technicals and it never would've come to what happened at the end.  Xavier made their school look just as bad as UC's.  There is no justifying either side.  I have no loyalty to either school.  My unbiased eyes saw both teams look embarrassing and it could've been avoided if both teams have just shut up.  Xavier sounded like thugs at the press conference.  They are no better than UC.  Tu Halloway asked the beat writer for Xavier to tweet, "We just put them (UC) in a f**king body bag."  That is pretty classless.  I can't even defend it.  I also can't understand the #13 on UC stomping on Fraese who I believe was attempting to stop the fight.  This is also very classless.  I hope they can continue to play the game annually because one bad event doesn't mean it will happen every year.  

Winner of the Day:  Alec Baldwin.  Yeah, Alec, you are an actor, so you are right you shouldn't have to follow the same rules that everyone else does.  He was thrown off of a plane for refusing to shut down "Words With Friends" on his cell phone for takeoff.  There was a point where I was addicted too, but it gets old fast Alec.  Trust me.  A month from now, you'll be burnt out.  The story.

Loser of the Day:  The city of Cincinnati.  On national TV, its two major college basketball programs were in a brawl and on Sunday its pro football team blew a win.  Not a good weekend for the city.

Quote of the Day: "If you can't beat them beat them."


Song of the Day: Don't Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin

Cool Animal of the Day: The Yeti Crab

From http://divaboo.info/

Kiwa hirsuta is a crustacean discovered in 2005 in the South Pacific Ocean. This decapod, which is approximately 15 cm (6 inches) long, is notable for the quantity of silky blond setae (resembling fur) covering its pereiopods (thoracic legs, including claws). Its discoverers dubbed it the "yeti lobster" or "yeti crab"[2].

K. hirsuta was discovered in March 2005 by a group organised by Robert Vrijenhoek of the Monterey Bay Aquarium Research Institute in Monterey, California, using the submarine DSV Alvin, operating from RV Atlantis[3]. The discovery was announced on the 7th of March, 2006. It was found 1,500 km (900 miles) south of Easter Island in the South Pacific, at a depth of 2,200 m (7,200 feet), living on hydrothermal vents along the Pacific-Antarctic Ridge[4]. Based on both morphology and molecular data, the species was deemed to form a new genus and family (Kiwaidae). The animal has strongly reduced eyes that lack pigment, and is thought to be blind.

The 'hairy' pincers contain filamentous bacteria, which the creature may use to detoxify poisonous minerals from the water emitted by the hydrothermal vents where it lives. Alternatively, it may feed on the bacteria, although it is thought to be a general carnivore[2]. Its diet also consists of green algae and small shrimp.