A Tribute to The Best Blog in the World, and some leftover Carrie vs Kelly

I had an entire blog written about Kelly Clarkson and Carrie Underwood that started like this:





Tonight I will be attending my company's Christmas party, and the entertainment for the show will be Carrie Underwood.  This had me thinking about the old American Idol debate, Kelly Clarkson or Carrie Underwood?  Who is better?  Now, Kelly burst on to the scene after winning the first season of the show.  Carrie won the 4th season.  There of course were other winners, including my personal favorite, Ruben Studdard, but none compare to the two talents mentioned above.  One, a mainstream pop princess with one of the biggest hits of the 00's; the other, a country goddess and every song that comes out of her mouth strikes gold.  So who truly is better?  Let's review their resumes:

And I chose Kelly due to without Kelly there'd be no Carrie even though I believe Carrie would have a much longer and successful career, but for some reason, my blog timed out and never autosaved after I wrote long resumes for each side including Kelly's horrible performance in From Justin to Kelly which makes Mariah Carey seem like an Oscar worthy actress.  I included how Kelly has won a Platinum ranking 9 times while Carrie's debut album went 7X platinum.  I added that Kelly's Since U Been Gone was #5 on Vh1's Top 100 Songs of the 00's while Carrie's Before He Cheats was #99.  I added Carrie had guest appearances on Blue Bloods and How I Met Your Mother and is married to a hockey player.  She has collaborated with Randy Travis while Kelly collaborated with Reba, who is a ginger therefore I can't stand the woman.  Anyway, I had all this worked out.  Kelly is hot right now, her album's huge, so I went with her.  I'm not redoing the compare chart, because for some reason google timed out on me and I lost all the information I typed.  I had the whole blog written and it was awesome.  These are just a few of the facts I had.  It was probably the best blog I've ever written..You can't dispute it because you never wrote it.  Kind of like the Tenacious D Tribute song, "This is not the greatest song in the world.  This is just a tribute."  This is a tribute blog to the best blog ever written. Yeah it was supposed to be about Kelly versus Carrie, but it branched out into the meaning of life, the sound only dogs can hear, the feeling one gets while making love or going down on a roller coaster....that's what reading today's blog would've been.  Unfortunately though, google ruined it.  I won't even capitalize your  name google, you are not worth it.  Yahoo! is calling my name.  Does Alta Vista still exist?  Remember the old search engine battle?  Now all you have is Bing, google, and Yahoo! Is ask Jeeves even around anymore?  There were about as many search engines as 10-10-321 long distance numbers back in the late 90's and early 2000's.   As you can tell I am angry at technology.  I'm like Will Smith in the black people version of the Terminator, IRobot.  I feel like I'm Hulking out into like Ving Rhames with bullets across my chest in army pants and no shirt, with a machine gun wanting to pick off anything that moves.  I'd be wearing eye black of course.  Anyway, google, you giant and pioneer of the final frontier of the world wide web, yeah you with your fruity colors and probably soon to join with Amazon to create a super website that already owns YouTube.  You destroyed my greatest blog ever, and disappointed my tens of viewers who look at this daily. I will boycott you until I have to look up some useless fact like who invented Big League Chew or who sang that one song in the 80's that bombed but was sampled in a new rap song which made it big?  My blood is now pumping and all I want is to snap necks.  You can mess with me.  Just don't touch my writing, you bastard.  Internet, you suck.  Why did you time me out anyway?  It's freaking google.  I checked that always keep me signed in box yet when I'm in the middle of something you just log me out.  At least wait until I'm finished.  I'm really lightheaded from this.  I think I need Michael Clarke Duncan to come suck the sick out of me like he did Tom Hanks.  So when you become an angel on Earth would you have big wings like John Travolta in "Michael" or would you be a gigantic black man in overalls with a mouse as a friend?  Anyway, my tribute to the best blog in the world must sadly end because I actually have to do some work, so have a good day readers; I'm sorry you are stuck with this tribute rather than the best blog ever written.  It's kind of like going to see a horrible cover band, rather than the real deal, but hey it's all I got left in me.

Winner of the Day: 

, for taking my soul.

Loser of the Day: My readers, for not being able to read my best of blogs.

Quote of the Day: "Everybody gets so much information all day long that they lose their common sense."-Gertrude Stein

Song of the Day: Tribute by Tenacious D

Tribute Item of the Day: Nelly's Band-Aid.  He wore the thing on his face because his homie, City Spud, you know, the guy from Ride Wit Me.  City went to prison and Nelly wore it in memory of him.... What a tribute.