What should I Write About? ---this one is the deepest blog I've written

So what does one write about when he really doesn't feel like writing today.  There is way too much going on in my head to even concentrate on writing a silly blog.  Should I write about how my coworker almost just choked on Frosted Flakes and if I were to die from that I would be okay with it because at least you get to taste a delicious Frosted Flake before you check out?  Should I write about the firing of Ozzie Guillen?  You either liked the guy or you hated him.  I thought he was a tell it like it is manager who was refreshing to the game and to this era's ridiculously pampered athletes.  Should I write about how five people (four of the same family) were murdered two nights ago in Cincinnati and the murderer is still on the loose?  Should I write about how they should put out an updated Mutant League Football video game?  Should I write about diabetes and how it sucks sometimes?  Should I write about how cantaloupe is killing people (thanks Mindy)? Here's the story. Should I write about Benson getting suspended or the legalization of marijuana or the meaning of life? No. No. And No.  Although if you know the answer of that last question please tell me.  I have always thought it had something to do with live your life in a way where you can look into the mirror everyday and be happy with who you are and making differences in other people's lives.  I've always wanted to be a fly in the wall at my own funeral to see not only who came but the stories they told about me to see if I truly meant something to them.  I hope I touch every person I talk to in some way.  My mind is changing.  I used to not care about serious stuff; I covered it up with humor.  I'm changing.  I'm becoming more philosophical although I am still funny.  I hate muffin tops as much as the next guy.  I am beginning to open up to this world.  I hope you all will still like me, which I'm sure you will because I'm that charming.  Anyway, I don't want to write about any of those things but I write because it is my escape.  It frees me from what is on my mind.  I cannot write about my personal life because quite frankly I cannot put it into words.  I truly don't know what path to take.  I'm 26 years old and I am at a crossroads.  I have a job which seems pretty secure.  I plan on moving out soon, but what do I do after that?  There is a void.  I've had several relationships in my life, but two that I would consider serious.  When I was 17 I gave my heart to someone.  Puppy love, some would say, but it was much more.  The relationship lasted three years and I came out of it a better person.  You know that saying you learn something new everyday?  Well, it's true.  Some people just don't use their knowledge.  Anyway, we both knew in that third year, the relationship wasn't going to be forever.  I needed to date other people.  She needed to get out of the monotonous grind our relationship had become.  We stayed close as friends for a while after.  Not like hook up and still make out and stuff friends, but like legitimate friends.    She began dating an acquaintance of mine.  He wasn't really a friend but I knew him before her and everything but after that we slowly drifted apart as friends and I moved on.  At that moment, getting back to learning, I knew I had to concentrate on myself.  I didn't date for a while and I started rebuilding.  Before my first love, I was a pessimist.  After, I became an optimist.  Sure, I joke about people but deep down I care about each and every one of you.  Anyway I decided to be happy and make others around me happy.  I needed to give off a vibe so that everyone around me smiles even if I was having a bad day.  I only thought about good things and such.  I am still that person.  Some people may see it as me being a pushover but I believe I'm a go with the flow type who truly cares about everyone.  I had my second serious relationship a little over a year ago.  It wasn't fair to her.  She was an amazing person and still is but it just wasn't the right fit.  She was just in love with being in love and I just needed to be in a relationship again.  It didn't fit at all, but I regret nothing I do and here's why...I learned in this relationship.  I broke it off before things got too serious.  I cared about her feelings but I could never see her as someone I could marry.  It wasn't fair to either of us to continue on.  I have been single since.  There's this void that is missing.  When I least expected it, someone recently came into my life and we hit it off right away.  We have a lot in common but enough different to where we can coexist.  The only problem is that she just got out of a relationship.  I don't want to be a rebound, although if you watch me on the hardwood I put up more boards than anyone I shoot with.  There is a friend line that we keep but it blurs every so often and I don't really know what to do.  This girl is like all I think about, but I should be thinking of other things because I don't want to rush anything.  It's not fair to her or me.  I want my next relationship to be long term.  I'm ready to put my heart into something.  I still want to be her friend.  I still want to be as close but I don't want the line to blur until we are both ready.  I know I call myself a relationship guru and everything, but I can't even figure things out when the situation is mine.  I throw every rule I live by out the window.  But if something means this much to you you have to fight for it.  Take the good times with the bad, the laughter with the tears.  So, in short that's what's on my mind.  What should I write about? Because I don't know.


WINNER OF THE DAY: N/A


LOSER OF THE DAY: This prison worker for having sex with an inmate.  Now she's going to be one. Here's the story.

QUOTE OF THE DAY: Beauty might bring happiness, but happiness always brings beauty. - Kevyn Aucoin.


SONG OF THE DAY: Feels like Home by 

Chantal Kreviazuk Lesson of the Day: Never give up on something you truly believe in.